


The Birth of Angra Mainyu

by Notsofatpinkcat



Category: Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms, Fate/stay night (Visual Novel), Fate/stay night - All Media Types, Fate/stay night: Heaven's Feel (Anime 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bad Ending, Gen, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2020-05-14 01:18:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19263061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Notsofatpinkcat/pseuds/Notsofatpinkcat
Summary: Shirou faces his final opponent at the end of a very long road. He's been preparing for this moment, and he knows what he has to do. What he wasn't prepared for, however, was the death of Tohsaka at the hands of her own younger sister, Sakura. And he was even further unprepared to have Sakura arrange him to be the vessel that Angra Mainyu would be born into and inhabit.





	The Birth of Angra Mainyu

I’m running. I’m running as fast as I can. I’m running to the middle of the cavern. That’s the only destination I know. No. There isn’t even anywhere else to go anyways. I have no choice. It doesn’t look like To▇sa▇▇ is fighting anymore. I have to get there fast. It might already be too late. No, it can’t be. We’ve already come so far. It can’t be too late. To▇▇▇▇▇ will be fine when I get there. The fighting stopped because she won. Right? That has to be why. Right? I scramble up the slope to the middle of the cave. It was hard to run here. It was hard to climb up. My limbs have been screaming at me. That’s not a metaphor. There’s a metallic screech noise with every step I take. My body is heavy but I kept going. How long did it take me to get here? It doesn’t matter. Everything has to be fine. Everything has to be fine. We couldn’t have failed. We can’t fail.  
I look around for any other life in the area. There’s only one other human here. And she’s laying on the ground dead. I know her, don’t I? I have to know her. Of course I do. She certainly looks familiar. My mind is hazy, and thoughts are aimlessly floating around my head. Her name. Her name is… it’s… ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇. It’s empty. My head is empty. I’m trying so hard. It’s on the tip of my tongue. T▇▇▇▇▇▇. It has to come back to me.I can’t forget here. It’s too important. My thoughts are interrupted though. There’s somebody else here, but she’s not human. She’s… She’s the Holy Grail. The girl named Sakura. There was another Grail too, right? But her name was different. She was… She was… ▇▇▇▇▇. Dammit. I don’t have time to be thinking so hard about this right now. I know these people were important to me, I get that feeling, so that’s all that matters.  
“Senpai. So you’re finally here. You’ve really kept me waiting, you know. Nee-san kept me occupied for most of the time though, so it wasn’t too bad.”  
“She… She didn’t kill you? But I thought―”  
“In the end, she couldn’t bring herself to kill me. So, I took my opportunity and seized victory as my own. And now, Senpai…”  
She looks at me with purely delighted and suggestive eyes, to tell me that she’s genuinely enjoying herself. It makes me feel sick to my stomach.  
“You get to bare witness to Angra Mainyu’s introduction into this world. You get even better than a front seat, in fact.”  
Sakur▇ gives me a devilish smile. It sends a shiver down my spine. What does she mean by that? ‘You get even better than a front seat.’ It makes me feel uneasy. I have to stop her, I have to stop Sa▇▇r▇ before she does anymore damage. Before she kills me. Before she kills anyone else. But this is… who is this… Sa▇▇r▇. Sa▇▇▇▇. No. My mind is getting cloudy again. I knew it just a moment ago. So why don’t I know now? I’m looking at her in fear, I can’t help but show the emotion on my face. But she seems absolutely thrilled by it. I get ready to take the shroud off my left arm but before I’m able to do so―  
I feel that I can no longer move my right arm. There’s a shadow creeping up it. There’s shadows creeping up my legs. I can’t move. No, these aren’t just shadows. They’re like mud. Horrible, black, toxic sludge from the grail. It’s creeping up my body slowly, and every small bit it gets further is excruciating pain. Pain that shoots through my entire body. Not even the swords that have become part of body can protect me from the pain I’m experiencing. The swords are just as vulnerable as the rest of me. I hear a laugh from the girl. It’s like she’s watching a show and enjoying every second of it.  
“Yes, senpai. I’ve decided the best way for you to die. And the best reward to me for all the pain and suffering that life has had to offer to me. You’ll get to meet Angra Mainyu, right here, right now. There’s no way for you to escape now that you’re being consumed.”  
The mud continues to climb my body slowly, making sure that no part of me is left untouched. Everything has to burn. Every bit of my skin has to burn and have this horrible pain spike through my body. Pain entering my body and echoing around within the confines of my skin. It’s like there’s ping pong balls bouncing around inside my body and they hurt everything they launch off of. More are added. They don’t stop. They bounce around off each other. I grit my teeth and try to bare it, but I can tell that I’m starting to tear up from the pain. Not just the physical pain, but the strain on my mind. This wasn’t the girl I knew. This wasn’t the girl I devoted everything to. I swore to keep her safe. To protect her. I failed. I’m failing at that. Remember her name. Why can’t I remember her name. I’m crying now. I can’t help it. It’s natural. Everything is hurting. I cough up blood as I try to remember her name by speaking it.  
“Sa….”  
What was it? Sa▇▇▇▇. Sa▇u▇▇. Sa▇ur▇. Sakur▇.  
“SAKURA!!!!”  
I yell as loud as my violently collapsing lungs allow me to. Even she looks surprised. I’m panting and gasping for air to fill my lungs. The mud has made its way up to my torso now. It’s climbing both my arms. Everything hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. It h rts. t rts. t r . —————. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇.▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇. ▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇.  
My senses are being overwhelmed. Its creeped up all the way to my neck now. It hurts to swallow. It hurts to breathe. Everything hurts. I can’t handle this. What’s happening to me? I want nothing more than to scream and cry out, but even that hurts. I’m trying to focus on so many things at once. I’m trying to focus on my collapsing mind. The pain that’s currently assaulting and invading my entire body. The girl in front of me. The girl on the ground next to her. Wait. What happened. Was there another girl here, dead on the ground? Where did she go. Wait. I think I see her. Part of her. She’s being devoured by the same black sludge that’s climbing my body. Her body is quickly swallowed up and it seems as if it has been entirely dissolved in an instant.  
“Nee-san no longer needs to be here, so I’ve decided to finally consume her. Besides, this is an important moment between the two of us, senpai. We wouldn’t want her ruining it, would we?” The girl speaks with an impish grin and laughs after making such a remark. She’s humored right now. She’s really enjoying herself.  
I’m struggling. I’m struggling really hard. I can’t move at all. I’m struggling to get out of whatever this sludge is but it’s to no avail because I can’t move even the slightest bit. The only function I have left now is blinking, and even then I’m scared to close my eyes because I’m afraid the next moment I won’t be able to open them since I’ll be entirely consumed.  
“Are… you… going to eat me… like you did to her..?” I speak as best as I can, but it’s in a weak and strained voice. I can’t help it. I sound like my life is draining out of body, which isn’t far from the truth at all. I think I’m dying right now. No, I know I’m dying right now. Once I ask her the question she looks at me endearingly and stifles a laugh.  
“No, no. Of course not. I have a much better plan for you. Avenger is going to be born into this world, but he has need for a vessel.” She approaches me and grabs my chin with her hand.  
“And I think I have the perfect vessel right in front of me.” She narrows her eyes and licks her lips before lowering her hand and taking a step back.  
Now I’m even more panicked than before. What’s going to happen to me? Two souls can’t exist in this body. Will I be forced out? Am I going to die? I’ve come too far to die. But now I’m utterly helpless. This is beyond my power. I’ve failed everyone. I’ve failed T▇▇▇▇▇▇. A▇c▇▇r. R▇▇e▇. I▇▇y▇. But most of all. I’ve failed Sakura. I couldn’t save her. I couldn’t keep any promises that I made. I guess the only promise I have kept was to ▇▇▇▇▇. I told her… what did I tell her? Oh. That I’d be on Sakura’s side until the very end. Now I have no choice but to be on her side until the very end, since my end is rapidly approaching.  
“Sakura plea—” I’m about to cry out and beg her to listen to me but as soon as I open my mouth the mud pours into it. And I thought that the pain on the outside of my body was bad. This is beyond words. I’m choking and it burns my insides as it continues to fill me up. Like I’m an empty mold and candle wax is pouring in to take the shape of the container. I’m really scared to close my eyes now. I’m going to lose my vision. If I close them I won’t be able to open them again. It was a mistake to keep my eyes open though. It mercilessly poured into them and stained my vision black anyways. It didn’t matter if they were open or not; I was going to lose my vision either way. Maybe it wouldn’t have burned so much if I had closed them. But I bet my eyelids would be burned right through even if I had closed them, so I wonder if that really matters anyways.  
I’m entirely covered now. Like a horrific cocoon of toxic, burning sludge. Caterpillars and worms become a liquid inside their cocoons, don’t they? And then they return to a proper being in their new, realized form. Either a moth or butterfly, or whatever bug they’re supposed to become. I’m really not sure what’s going to emerge from this cocoon, but I know that it won’t be me. It’s going to be somebody else, inhabiting my body. I feel I must have gotten used to the pain by now. Not a single corner of my body has been left untouched by this horrible monstrosity. My entire body has been branded by it, and it now claims me as its host. I’m waiting to die. I’m waiting to stop feeling existence. But it hasn't come yet. I’m waiting but it’s not happening. My eyes are shut tight. When did I shut them? I move my fingers. Since when was I able to move?  
I’m scared to open my eyes. There’s still a pain in my body and it’s getting worse by the second. It’s not the same feeling as before. It’s a new kind of pain. It’s like there’s a parasite inside of me, and it’s trying to take over. I forcibly cough up blood and I can feel it splatter on my hands. Upon opening my eyes, I realize it wasn’t blood. I just coughed up the black sludge that had been previously attacking my body a moment ago. These aren’t my hands though. They can’t be. There’s no way. They’re covered in markings. In fact, my arms are covered in markings too. And my legs. And all of my body. This is still my body, but in a way it seems foreign to me now. And on top of that… I cough up more of the mud. It hurts. It’s like my soul is being forced out of this body.  
Sakura seems a bit angry now. She’s glaring at me, but now in the satisfied way she was before. She seems really frustrated, like something’s gone wrong. Maybe this is my chance, maybe I can do something now.  
“You’re really persistent, senpai. I had always admired that about you. You kept trying at something even when it was obviously impossible. And even now you’re trying to fight Angra Mainyu’s soul and keep control of your body.”  
Is that what’s happening? That explains it well. There’s two souls in this body right now, and both of them are fighting for dominance. The only problem is that Angra’s soul is overpowering mine, especially since he’s had Sakura’s help placing him into this body. I can’t just give up. I have to say I tried. But who will there be to tell that I tried? There’s nobody. There’s nobody. There’s Nobody. There’s NoBody. THere’s NoBOdy. Everyone is dead. I’m going to die. No matter how hard a fight I put up I am going to die. My body will continue on, with a different soul, not my own. It’s going to be a shell for a different soul. I vomit up the sludge again. I won’t be able to hold out much longer. I’m trying to lift my arm and I’m struggling. My arm shakes intensely as I try to lift it. It’s no use. She’s watching me struggle. She scoffs at it.  
Suddenly, I feel my senses fading. I’m getting weaker. It’s getting harder to move my arm. Now I can only feel my fingers. I can just barely move them as I try and make a fist. Now I can only feel the fingertips. Now I can’t feel my body at all. My sight is fading. Everything is going dark. The girl starts to speak but I can’t understand any of it. It sounds like it’s muffled. Like she’s talking into a pillow.  
“▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇.”  
What is she saying? The only sense I have now is being able to feel my heartbeat. To my surprise, it’s not getting slower. It’s getting faster. It’s speeding up. I think this might be worse than slowing down. It feels like it’s going to burst. It’s going to explode. The girl repeats herself.  
“▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇.”  
I still can’t understand it.  
“H▇▇▇y▇▇ir▇▇d▇▇▇A▇▇▇▇.”  
It’s getting clearer. The more clear it gets the faster my heart beats.  
“Ha▇▇y▇Bir▇▇d▇y▇A▇gr▇.”  
My heart's on fire. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode. It’s going to explode  
“Happy Birthday Angra.”  
I finally understand what she’s saying. It’s over. As soon as I hear what she’s saying, I feel something burst and I cease to exist.

**Author's Note:**

> hey if ur reading this then cool im glad you made it this far and read the whole thing. anyways heres some rambling from me. I finished all 3 of the routes in the realta nua VN and was talking to my friend who set them up for me and had already played through them. I had an idea that I was thinking abt a lot which happened to be this. I messaged her and said hey how fucked up would it be if Sakura forced Angra Mainyu to be born into Shirou's body and he died in a horribly painful awful way. And then you know, you could just use the sprites of Angra from Hollow Ataraxia in this theoretical ending. To which she responded, "BRUH. THATS FUCKING HORRIFYING." and that response is the reason why I wrote this. I dedicate this to you, Snappy. Didn't intend to upload this but then I remembered oh wait I DO have an AO3 account. so why not. maybe this was a kind of edgy piece of writing. but u know what. i dont really care. its a dead/bad end. and for heavens feel nonetheless. what else would you expect lmao. also i didnt proofread this & its midnight so sorry if something doesnt make sense or theres a mistake somewhere. highkey posting this for fun, and idk if i'll write more in the future. but i hope probably i will


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